Friday, March 31, 2017

Political Uterus

Political Uterus




This isn’t a tested pattern...its just my notes from making a few of these so far... if you find a mistake or a better way to do it... please comment or send me message on Ravelry!

I used size 3 40 inch long circulars for magic loop because I wanted tight stitches since I knew I was going to be using loose stuffing.

Red Heart Soft in Dark Pink and a mystery baby pink worsted leftover from one of the million pink baby things I’ve made over the last few years.

M1L/M1R - Make 1 right/left tutorial can be found here.

SSK - tutorial can be found here

KFBF tutorial can be found here.

Cast on 24 to the needles using Judy's Magic Cast On

Knit one round

 K1P1 ribbing for 7 rows

Knit one round

K1, M1L, knit to 1 stitch before end and M1R, K1  and repeat on other side/needle

Knit one round

Repeat the last two rows until you have 36 stitches on each needle.


Work the #resist chart (or if you have another political message in mind…) 

All stitches in the chart are knit, the white is your main color and the black is your contrast color. 



Slip first 12 stitches onto scrap yarn, knit across to last 12 stiches, slip 12 stitches to another piece of scrap yarn. On needle 2, slip first 12 stitches onto the same scrap yarn as the last 12 of needle 1. Knit across to last 12 stitches and slip those onto the same scrap yarn as the first 12 stitches from needle 1. This is like separating for sweater sleeves.

 Knit one round on the stitches left on the needles, add stuffing to desired fullness and then bind off using preferred bind off... I like the three needle bind off for this. 

Put the stitches from one of the pieces of scrap yarn onto the needles, and pick up two stitches from where your bind off in the middle is.  

Knit 10 rounds
 Add a little bit of stuffing (I used yarn scraps) as you go. 
On the needle that is on the "back side" of the tube, decrease by one stitch in whatever your preferred decrease is every other row until you have 10 stitches remaining total.  I used SSK for my decreases, and periodically moved stitches from the "front" needle to the back to keep it even. 

Knit 14 rows (or to your preferred tube length).

Add stuffing to desired fullness.

Kfbf (Knit into the front and back, and then into the front again) of each stitch on the needles.

Bind off using a stretchy bind off of your choice - I used Jeny's Surprisingly Stretchy bind off method.

Make a pom pom in your contrast color and sew into the end of your tube. 

Repeat for other side. 

Thats it! You've made a #politicaluterus! 


I'd prefer it if people didn't sell these... but obviously its the internet. I can't stop you... but don't be an asshole... at least credit me for the pattern! 



Thursday, March 30, 2017

A few years later...and I'm back.

Well. It's not like I was gone. I just wasn't blogging. I'm a terrible blogger. You all know that.

I won't promise to be a better blogger... cause I tried that and it doesn't work. I will however promise to think  about it more? Yea. Who knows. In any case, I'm here now and that is what matters right?

I've been making things... lots of things. I'll post some pictures. I'm working on a couple patterns and I'll be posting them here soon.

My most recent projects have been some uteruses. It started out as a mojo gift for a friend in a Facebook group who was having a hysterectomy... then as a mojo for a friend who was trying to get pregnant...then for some friends who wanted them as political statements.




I finally delved into lace shawls and the four I've done so far have turned out good!





There's a bunch of other stuff too...but too many pics to post.

I'll hopefully be back later to post the pattern for the #politicaluterus

Thursday, May 9, 2013

Bad, bad Blogger...

Once again I am admitting to bring a horrible blogger. LOL

I'm gonna try (no really this time I mean it!) to get posts out more frequently than once a year. That being said, let's catch up.

What I did this year :

*Turned 30 ( and it wasn't so bad)
My birthday drink

*Met a fantastic guy (My hard to impress mother calls him Mr. Wonderful so that should tell you something)
Damn that's a good looking cowboy!


* Got knocked up! (Baby #3 coming September 2013)
Its a boy!

*Moved to Oregon

*Started blogging again


 So there you have it folks. my life in 20 seconds.

I'll be back later to add a few projects and photos of said projects...

Thursday, March 22, 2012

Am I Pinteresting? Why yes. Yes.I.Am.

Have you heard of Pinterest? Well of course you have. It's all the rage these days. It is. SO ADDICTING. It's almost as bad as that weekend I spent in 2005 glued to the PS2 and The Sims. Or that week last year I spent with Portal and youtube tutorials.

If you haven't heard of it, then its time to crawl out from under whatever rock you're hiding under and join in the fun. Pinterest is basically a big gifreakingnourmos bulletin board. The whole world is in on it. You find and pin interesting things from the internet. Places you would like to go. Recipes you would like to try. People you would like to do. I mean Things you would like to do. Ya. Thats it. Thats what I meant. lol. Funny posters, funny videos. Like the one with Kristen Bell and the Sloth.

It's also a wealth of info and resources, ideas and inspirations for crafty folks such as ourselves. Lots of patterns, neat ideas and pretty inspirations for knitting ,crocheting, sewing and scrapbooking....etc. ETC.

Pinterest has become not just a fun thing to do, but also an inspiration for bloggers. A good friend of mine started a really cool blogging project called Find, Pin and DO! I'm also a guest blogger over there (although I haven't ACTUALLY posted an entry yet...but I will. Soon.)

So check out Pinterest. and Find, Pin and Do!

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Airport Security and Knitting needles. A comedy.

So about 45 minutes ago I went through security at Sacramento International Airport (in Sacramento CA in case anyone happens to care).

In my purse ( a Namaste Monroe bag, again...in case anyone cares...and because I kind of want to show off that I have a Namaste Monroe bag) I have my Puff knitting and also two skeins of Red Heart Soft, a set of size 9 dpns, 32 inch Circular size 9, and the size 4 dpns required for puff knitting.

I am no stranger to air travel. I have flown several times with knitting and knitting related paraphernalia. I've never been questioned or challenged about anything.

Today was different.

So I'm going through the security line and as I walk up to the little table where all the trays are, I unzip my boots (shut up. I know, I shouldn't have worn knee high boots for air travel this day in age...but whatever they are hot and I love them.) and start gathering all of my pocket stuff to put in the little tray bucket thing. I walk up to the table, put all of my stuff in the trays, and lay my purse down in the tray (It's an Effing Namaste bag. I'm not putting this thing down on that dirty conveyor belt). I walk through like everyone else, raise my arms and get magnetically violated. After said violation I walk over to collect my stuff and the large busted, long armed woman with the metal detector wand is looking right at me.

Great. I've been singled out to be "randomly searched". They pull my bag out of the tray and Busty Lady starts rifling through. She gets to the center compartment and pulls out my knitting. SHE PULLED OUT MY KNITTING AND PULLED STITCHES OF THE NEEDLE IN THE PROCESS. Just for that alone, I should have gone completely batshit. You all should be watching me on the news right now.

I resisted the urge to go all Hulk on her ass, and just calmly asked her to please handle that with care. Then she comes to my bag'o puff knitting. She pulls out the DPNs and looks at me like I had a fuse sticking out of my shoe.

I eyeballed her back.

"What exactly are these for?" She asks.

"Knitting." I say.

"My grammy knits. I've never seen no Crazy lookin short sticks like this before" She says.

*sigh*

I explain the uses and advantages of DPN's and next thing I know, I have four women and one adorable and totally NOT straight Airport Security person standing around looking at my knitting needles. THEN she pulls out the puffs. OH SWEET BABY JEEZUS ON A CRACKER.

It took me 40 minutes to get through  A COMPLETELY DESERTED security line because I had to explain over, and OVER again to several different people the appeal of puffs.

ON the upside. I did get two phone numbers ( of elderly grandma types...but it counts) from women who want to learn to knit and want to be directed towards the Ossim that is Ravelry.

Moral of todays story is....

Well there really isn't a moral. It's just kind of a funny story.